The Attack of Rampant Hedonism

Marriage is under intense attack by Satan. Over the next few articles I will examine three ways Satan attacks: 1. rampant hedonism (the playboy philosophy) 2. widespread acceptance of adultery 3. easy divorce

All three of these attacks of Satan are made palatable, acceptable, and even desirable to us by the love of self. If our philosophy is, “I’m number one!” where we elevate ourselves to the most important position, we won’t defend our marriage. We won’t fight for it. The “me” marriage isn’t one we are usually willing to put any effort in to.

Let’s look at rampant hedonism. This is also called the “New Morality,” which really means “No Morality.” It is sometimes referred to as the “Sexual Revolution,” a revolt against Biblical morality. The philosophy is simply this: sex with whomever and whenever we feel like it. “After all, everybody is doing it.” At least that is what they want us to think. Sex is fine, they say, before and outside of marriage. That’s why we need to hand out condoms in our high schools, because we can’t expect the kids to show any restraint. Really? Why can’t you? Who is giving them all this unsupervised time anyway? It’s too bad they don’t have parents.

In reality, the new morality is simply sex out of control, sex with no ethical norms, except some vague, “As long as it doesn’t hurt anyone.” That, of course, is determined by the situation, we are told. Ethics are situational, that is their mantra. But who can really tell what the situation is? Do you know all the facts in any given situation? Can anyone make a rational decision in the passion of the moment while alone in the back seat of a car on some secluded lane? Or while cuddled alone in front of the fireplace in your apartment? Can you rationally consider the consequences in the passion of the moment? Not on your life! The raging hormones turn off the rational part of the brain.

Can you always anticipate the consequences of getting AIDs or herpes to take home to your marriage partner? How about an unplanned baby? Nor do people consider the hurt to their spouse at having to share what God intended as exclusive. That applies even to your future spouse who, yes, will be sick at heart that you didn’t wait.

Or can you know the consequences caused by the dissatisfaction it might bring into your marriage? You might find that your spouse does not live up to the excitement the other illicit relationships brought you, or that pornography showed you. You live continually with the desire for someone else other than your spouse, feeding off fantasies or pornography. As Gary Thomas writes concerning the man effected by pornography, “His expectations have been jettisoned to a dangerous place. He’s trained himself to think that women like to do certain things, actually enjoy certain things, and act in ways that bear zero resemblance to reality.”

Or, your past indiscretions could leave such guilt or such bad feelings toward sex that you rob your partner. When you get married, you always bring your past into the marriage. And illicit sex may leave you experienced, but it never gives you the tools to enjoy God-ordained sexual intimacy in marriage.

Hedonism is always destructive to marriage. As Gary Thomas says:

“If there weren’t consequences to sexual sin, it seems unlikely that God would forbid it. He is a gracious God, not capricious, definitely not malicious, and amazingly kind and generous. Directly rebelling against His wisdom, doing nothing about it, and then expecting there to be no consequences is worse than calling God a liar; it is calling Him a pleasure-killing, malicious liar.”

If that defined your life as a single, it carries over into marriage. Only repentance and forgiveness can break you free from its chains of slavery. According to Gary Thomas, “God can intervene, restore, and recreate, but He doesn’t do that on the back of fraud and denial. He heals through the practice of confession, repentance, and the applied blood of Jesus Christ. Anything less won’t cut it.” Only then can you, in the words of Dr. Steve Wilke, “surrender yourselves in a relationship where you are truly loved, cared for, and protected, and where there is spiritual covering through prayer and the Word.” That is the joy of Biblical sex.